Dumb bird

11/07/2007 by Lee.

Why are pidgeons more stupid than other birds?

On my drive to work I pass numerous road kills, most of which are being scavenged by birds. Crows and magpies all fly off when they hear the car approaching, generally in a safe direction. A magpie even seems to be able to deduce which side of the road I’m on and remain in place if it is in no danger. Not pidgeons, oh no, not them. Firstly, it takes them some time to detect my approach. You would think a ton of steel moving at 70 mph would make some noise, but obviously not on the correct frequency for this dumb bird. When it eventually does realise that there may be trouble on four wheels bearing down upon it, the rat of the sky goes into panic mode. Whilst evidently capable of flight, a pidgeons “fight or flight” reflex seems to have become, “fight or strut around in circles like a loon” reflex.

As I get closer, the circular srutting becomes ever more frantic, before the memory of flight trips a switch in its head. Sadly, this switch always seems to get turned on just as I get level with the soon to be “ex” pidgeon.

Luckily for me, I only caught the bird a glancing blow. No doubt enough to leave the bird playing a harp on a cloud somewhere, but without leaving the normal residual detritus all over my car. I don’t recall ever striking any bird other than a pidgeon, yet they are only one breed of this prolific species. There must be a gene or part of their DNA make up that makes them dim and susceptible to an early death.

If only we could isolate that gene and lace all Burberry clothing with it, we could solve many of societies current ills. 

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